Albert Brooks Quotes

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'Drive' came to me because the casting director knew my manager and called and said, 'You've always talked to me about Albert wanting to play the heavy. I think he should read this.' My ears just perked up.
— Albert Brooks

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All improv turns into anger. All comedy improv basically turns into anger, because that's all people know how to do when they're improvising. If you notice shows that are improvising are generally people yelling at each other.

Albert Brooks

As an actor, if you're just sitting and staring and you don't know who you are in your own mind, it's vacant. And sometimes the camera is an X-ray machine, it can pick it up.

Albert Brooks

Be generous and you can be the best person who ever lived.

Albert Brooks

Bullfights are hugely popular because you can sit comfortably with a hot dog and possibly watch a man die. It won't be me, but I can sit comfortably and watch it.

Albert Brooks

By the way, movies are like sporting events in that you're as good as the movie you're in. You can sit in a room for 20 years and go do a movie and you can just kill in it and you move to the head of the line again. By the same token, you can do five movies a year and if they're dreck, it's nothing.

Albert Brooks

Even if you didn't see the movie, you'd see two words you'd never seen put together before - comedy and Muslim. Comedy is friendly - it's the least offensive word in our language.

Albert Brooks

Even though my father was a radio comedian, it wasn't cool to say, at a young age, 'I want to be a comedian.'

Albert Brooks

How many people didn't get a part who would have been better than the person who got the part? Thousands.

Albert Brooks

I can't not put humor in a book.

Albert Brooks

I cast unusual people in my movies.

Albert Brooks

I come from the place where I am thinking 'I have put my blood on the pages.'

Albert Brooks

I don't think the goal is, 'How big a star did you ever become?' I think the goal is, 'Were you able to express yourself?'

Albert Brooks

I don't want to be the one to break it to you, but the future ain't that funny.

Albert Brooks

I guess 'The Player' was a pretty good L.A. movie. And 'Chinatown.' Was there ever a better L.A. movie about a certain period in L.A.? That was terrific.

Albert Brooks

I had a very wise person tell me that he thinks marriage, when you're younger, you keep thinking you can fix things. That's what people do. And you can't really fix anything. It shouldn't be a massive difficult thing every day. Life's difficult enough.

Albert Brooks

I just like making people laugh, and buried in that I like to bring up topics and start discussions.

Albert Brooks

I like movies about failing.

Albert Brooks

I never wanted to be a director.

Albert Brooks

I take anything other than 'you big pig!' as a compliment.

Albert Brooks

I think anger and laughter are very close to each other, when you think about it.

Albert Brooks

I was in Kashmir last weekend. Went to visit one of my sweaters.

Albert Brooks

I, sort of, got into comedy accidentally, and it got bigger than I wanted it to.

Albert Brooks

I'd still like to see 'Survivor' minus the planned show-biz parts. That would be the purest form of show business - I want to see someone so hungry that they eat somebody else's foot.

Albert Brooks

I'm a member of the Academy, but I don't know who all the other Academy members are. It's not like a politician who knows who is in the Iowa caucus.

Albert Brooks

I'm a strong fellow.

Albert Brooks

I'm not a big fan of the post-Armageddon stories, where Denzel Washington is walking around in a torn coat.

Albert Brooks

I'm not Elvis. I don't get chased by paparazzi.

Albert Brooks

I'm not interesting enough on my own that you'd want to see a film about me.

Albert Brooks

I've always been in the middle of making my own movies, so taking acting jobs that take me away from that has been impossible.

Albert Brooks

I've always been the king of silence. I've always been a minimalist comedian. I've taken my influence from Jack Benny, who was the king of that... I've always done 'less is more.'

Albert Brooks

I've always liked to think ahead. Not stupid-far ahead. A hundred years doesn't interest me. But 20 years interests me, and more for what happens to humans as opposed to things.

Albert Brooks

I've been to many funerals of funny people, and they're some of the funniest days you'll ever have, because the emotions run high.

Albert Brooks

I've done performances in movies that I was immensely proud of and the movies didn't take off like a rocket at Cape Canaveral, it didn't take off.

Albert Brooks

If I'm going to act in someone's movie, I want the movie to be interesting and be able to get a couple of solid doubles.

Albert Brooks

If we had 3 million exhibitionists and only one voyeur, nobody could make any money.

Albert Brooks

If you look at the best-seller list for American fiction, they're all sequels to detective stories or stories about hunting serial killers. That's what's called American fiction these days.

Albert Brooks

If you paint, write, do mosaics, knit - if it's solving that part of your brain saying, 'I need to do this,' you've won.

Albert Brooks

If you want to be a writer, just write. There's no magic to it.

Albert Brooks

If you're going to act and do this for a living, you want to play something that the audience didn't expect.

Albert Brooks

In my screenplays - from the very beginning I've always used tape. I talk my screenplays. And then have somebody transcribe them.

Albert Brooks

It's better to be known by six people for something you're proud of than by 60 million for something you're not.

Albert Brooks

It's interesting when you're part of a group - the Jews, to be exact - that the world has had such problems with.

Albert Brooks

Listen, there are some movies that are set in stone and the writer or the director does not want to change, but I've never worked on a movie, including my own, that didn't take advantage of a rehearsal process.

Albert Brooks

Most entertainment is trying to get you. It's tested, like toothpaste.

Albert Brooks

Movies are an expensive business.

Albert Brooks

My friend Harry Nilsson used to say the definition of an artist was someone who rode way ahead of the herd and was sort of the lookout. Now you don't have to be that, to be an artist. You can be right smack-dab in the middle of the herd. If you are, you'll be the richest.

Albert Brooks

My mom was a professional. My dad and mom met each other in a movie called 'New Faces of 1937.' My mom went under the name Thelma Leeds, and she did a few movies, and she was really a great singer, and when she married my dad and started to have a family, she sang at parties.

Albert Brooks

Nobody will leave any place unless they're forced out. That's the nature of humans. Once you're there, you're there. I've never seen anybody get up voluntarily and leave any place.

Albert Brooks

Once you sign on as an actor, you know, you don't go to the editing room, you don't see how they cut, you don't see how they score, you don't see how they cast the rest of the movie.

Albert Brooks

'Drive' came to me because the casting director knew my manager and called and said, 'You've always talked to me about Albert wanting to play the heavy. I think he should read this.' My ears just perked up.

Albert Brooks