Tina Fey Quotes

A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really... - Tina Fey

A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss.
— Tina Fey

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Acting is really about showing up that day and telling the writers what you feel like saying.

Tina Fey

After college, I knew I wanted to work in comedy, so the first thing I did was go to where the comedy was. I moved from Charlottesville to Chicago, because that's where The Second City and Improv Olympics are. You have to go wherever you need to go to study what interests you.

Tina Fey

An interim government was set up in Afghanistan. It included two women, one of whom was Minister of Women's Affairs. Man, who'd she have to show here ankles to to get that job?

Tina Fey

Being a mom has made me so tired. And so happy.

Tina Fey

Doing one movie every two years is about all I can handle 'cause, being the creator at '30 Rock', my year there starts in the middle of June and goes back around until March.

Tina Fey

Even when I was at 'SNL,' I didn't do impersonations. I always wanted to be the kind of person who could do them - I always thought they were the coolest thing on the show - but I didn't have any experience.

Tina Fey

Every kid has something they're good at, that you hope they find and gravitate toward.

Tina Fey

For my first show at 'SNL', I wrote a Bill Clinton sketch, and during our read-through, it wasn't getting any laughs. This weight of embarrassment came over me, and I felt like I was sweating from my spine out. But I realized, 'Okay, that happened, and I did not die.' You've got to experience failure to understand that you can survive it.

Tina Fey

I am constantly amazed by Tina Fey. And I am Tina Fey.

Tina Fey

I am extremely square and obedient in nature!

Tina Fey

I didn't get on TV until I was 30, which is really fortunate because you are who you are at that point.

Tina Fey

I do like to start on time; I like to set the bar high for people.

Tina Fey

I don't enjoy any kind of danger or volatility. I don't have that kind of 'I love the bad guys' thing. No, no thank you. I like nice people.

Tina Fey

I don't like a tremendous amount of conflict. I don't think that fighting and passion are the same thing.

Tina Fey

I don't like my feet. I'm not crazy about anybody's feet. But I have flat feet.

Tina Fey

I don't want to be somebody else.

Tina Fey

I don't weigh myself. I just go by if my clothes fit. I try not to participate too much in the incredible amount of wasted energy that women have around dealing with food. I just feel like being healthy is sort of a job requirement to be on TV, and being a writer is so much coping with fatigue and stress, and you just eat. You eat to stay awake.

Tina Fey

I dreamed of being an actress when I was a little kid because you don't know then that the writer writes everything the actor is saying. But as I got older, I got into college and became more aware that writing is another option, and I started getting into it, too.

Tina Fey

I feel like I represent normalcy in some way.

Tina Fey

I feel like it's harder to get women to show up for movies.

Tina Fey

I got a fan letter on the back of a prison menu. And I remember thinking, 'Well, they get pie. It's not so bad. They get pie on the weekends.' I want to say blueberry and also a Boston cream pie. Not so bad.

Tina Fey

I grew up in a family of Republicans. And when I was 18 and registering to vote, my mom's only instruction was 'You just go in and pull the big Republican lever.' That's my welcome to adulthood. She's like, 'No, don't even read it. Just pull the Republican lever.

Tina Fey

I have to say, I'm really not that attractive. Until I met my husband, I could not get a date.

Tina Fey

I have two daughters, and we live here in Manhattan, and having gone through the Manhattan kindergarten application process, nothing will ever rival the stress of that.

Tina Fey

I like to delude myself that I'm in the old-Hollywood mode. I just tailor my clothes well and try to keep my skin clear. While it would be great to work out an hour a day, there is something inherently sort of selfish about it. I can't do it.

Tina Fey

I like to write about women, not so much about the way they relate to men, but about the way they relate to each other.

Tina Fey

I like to write about women, not so much about the way they relate to men, but about the way they relate to each other. And I don't think anyone's really doing it.

Tina Fey

I never get to go to movies, because I'm a mom.

Tina Fey

I really admire stand-up, and I think I would have loved to learn how to do it. I think it's terrifying and thrilling. A really cool thing to do. It's a dying art, in a way.

Tina Fey

I really love cursing a lot. But as I get older, I realize it's a little unseemly for women of a certain age.

Tina Fey

I really wasn't heavy in high school. But no one feels right in their own skin, particularly in high school.

Tina Fey

I remember failing my Princeton interview. My mom wanted me to apply because ever since I was a kid she had this dream that I would apply to Princeton, but it was just not happening.

Tina Fey

I still want Oprah to play my best friend. I want to spend time with Oprah.

Tina Fey

I think everyone's intentions are to become a performer at first. But by the time I was in high school and college, I discovered that I liked writing and that I was probably a little better at it.

Tina Fey

I think for women especially, you need to have a plan. I need to have some other ways to generate income, so I don't have to stretch my face or lift the top of my head with surgery or something.

Tina Fey

I think if you ask any of us here, we all dreamed of ending up on Saturday Night Live. I remember thinking, 'I'll just keep doing this as long as I can get away with it.'

Tina Fey

I think my level of fame will drop back down. I think it'll recede. In fact, I know it will. That's life on Planet Earth. And I'm okay with that. Besides getting tables at restaurants and special treatment at the airport, what else is there?

Tina Fey

I think part of picking where you live in New York is accepting who you are. Really looking at yourself and going, 'Yeah, I'm not cool enough for the West Village.'

Tina Fey

I think people fetishize glasses in general. You could put glasses on a rotting pumpkin and people would think it was sexy.

Tina Fey

I think the world has too many actresses.

Tina Fey

I think you basically have to abandon the dreams of having any other adult activities in your life. You have to go to sleep whenever your child goes to sleep.

Tina Fey

I want to spend time with Oprah, and I don't know what I need to do to make that happen.

Tina Fey

I want to thank my parents for somehow raising me to have confidence that is disproportionate with my looks and abilities.

Tina Fey

I was a very confident little kid.

Tina Fey

I was the editor of the school newspaper and in drama club and choir, so I was not a popular girl in the traditional sense, but I think I was known for being relatively scathing.

Tina Fey

I work, and then whenever I have any other time, I'm with my daughter, and then I go to sleep. I think you basically have to abandon the dreams of having any other adult activities in your life. You have to go to sleep whenever your child goes to sleep. That's basically how we're doing it.

Tina Fey

I'm a big fan of 'The Office', both the British and the American versions.

Tina Fey

I'm married, you know. I love my husband and I have a child.

Tina Fey

I'm more of a writer than an actor, and I used to say that I'm mostly an improviser, though I haven't improvised in awhile.

Tina Fey

A Harvard Medical School study has determined that rectal thermometers are still the best way to tell a baby's temperature. Plus, it really teaches the baby who's boss.

Tina Fey