Will Rogers Quotes

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Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.
— Will Rogers

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More Will Rogers Quotes

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Diplomacy is the art of saying 'Nice doggie' until you can find a rock.

Will Rogers

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Diplomacy is the art of saying "Nice doggie" until you can find a rock.

Will Rogers

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Diplomats are just as essential to starting a war as soldiers are for finishing it... You take diplomacy out of war, and the thing would fall flat in a week.

Will Rogers

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Do the best you can, and don't take life too serious.

Will Rogers

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Don't gamble; take all your savings and buy some good stock and hold it till it goes up, then sell it. If it don't go up, don't buy it.

Will Rogers

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Don't let yesterday use up too much of today.

Will Rogers

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Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there.

Will Rogers

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Even though you are on the right track - you will get run over if you just sit there.

Will Rogers

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Everybody is ignorant, only on different subjects.

Will Rogers

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Everything is changing. People are taking their comedians seriously and the politicians as a joke.

Will Rogers

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Everything is funny, as long as it's happening to somebody else.

Will Rogers

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Get someone else to blow your horn and the sound will carry twice as far.

Will Rogers

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Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes from bad judgment.

Will Rogers

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Half our life is spent trying to find something to do with the time we have rushed through life trying to save.

Will Rogers

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I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.

Will Rogers

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I belong to no organized party. I am a Democrat.

Will Rogers

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I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him 'father.'

Will Rogers

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I bet after seeing us, George Washington would sue us for calling him "father."

Will Rogers

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I don't make jokes. I just watch the government and report the facts.

Will Rogers

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I guess there is nothing that will get your mind off everything like golf. I have never been depressed enough to take up the game, but they say you get so sore at yourself you forget to hate your enemies.

Will Rogers

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I have a scheme for stopping war. It's this - no nation is allowed to enter a war till they have paid for the last one.

Will Rogers

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I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.

Will Rogers

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I read about eight newspapers in a day. When I'm in a town with only one newspaper, I read it eight times.

Will Rogers

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I'm not a real movie star. I've still got the same wife I started out with twenty-eight years ago.

Will Rogers

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If advertisers spent the same amount of money on improving their products as they do on advertising then they wouldn't have to advertise them.

Will Rogers

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If I studied all my life, I couldn't think up half the number of funny things passed in one session of congress.

Will Rogers

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If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?

Will Rogers

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If the other fellow sells cheaper than you, it is called dumping. 'Course, if you sell cheaper than him, that's mass production.

Will Rogers

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A difference of opinion is what makes horse racing and missionaries.

Will Rogers

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A fool and his money are soon elected.

Will Rogers

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A holding company is a thing where you hand an accomplice the goods while the policeman searches you.

Will Rogers

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A man only learns in two ways, one by reading, and the other by association with smarter people.

Will Rogers

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A remark generally hurts in proportion to its truth.

Will Rogers

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About all I can say for the United States Senate is that it opens with a prayer and closes with an investigation.

Will Rogers

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Advertising is the art of convincing people to spend money they don't have for something they don't need.

Will Rogers

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Alexander Hamilton started the U.S. Treasury with nothing, and that was the closest our country has ever been to being even.

Will Rogers

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All I know is just what I read in the papers, and that's an alibi for my ignorance.

Will Rogers

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America is a nation that conceives many odd inventions for getting somewhere but it can think of nothing to do once it gets there.

Will Rogers

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America is becoming so educated that ignorance will be a novelty. I will belong to the select few.

Will Rogers

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An economist's guess is liable to be as good as anybody else's.

Will Rogers

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An ignorant person is one who doesn't know what you have just found out.

Will Rogers

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An onion can make people cry but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh.

Will Rogers

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Ancient Rome declined because it had a Senate, now what's going to happen to us with both a House and a Senate?

Will Rogers

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Anything important is never left to the vote of the people. We only get to vote on some man; we never get to vote on what he is to do.

Will Rogers

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Be thankful we're not getting all the government we're paying for.

Will Rogers

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Being a hero is about the shortest-lived profession on earth.

Will Rogers

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Buy land. They ain't making any more of the stuff.

Will Rogers

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Chaotic action is preferable to orderly inaction.

Will Rogers

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Communism to me is one-third practice and two-thirds explanation.

Will Rogers

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Democrats never agree on anything, that's why they're Democrats. If they agreed with each other, they would be Republicans.

Will Rogers